Thursday, September 4, 2008

Debunking some homeschool myths (part 11)

As with any subculture of our society , there are many stereotypes and perceptions about homeschoolers that are floating around out there in the general population. Some of them are rather funny (we all wear denim jumpers and braided hair and have large families) while others are of a more serious nature (we all have the patience of Job). Homeschoolers themselves are not immune from falling for some of these misperceptions. We all think that some other homeschool mom "has it all together" and if we could only be like her, we'd be all set. You know the mom I mean, the homeschool version of the Proverbs 31 woman.


She is up at dawn (or before) to exercise and spend an hour reading her Bible and praying. She makes healthy lunches for her husband to take to work. She is always freshly showered and makeuped (is that a word?) and greets the children each morning with a lovely smile and encouraging words. Her home is always clean and even her closets are organized. She is always prepared for school with awesome lesson plans and her children always love to do their schoolwork and are always obedient. They study latin, read voraciously, take violin lessons and advanced math, and still manage to be finished with school by noon, after which they are free to pursue their own interests (such as starting their own business at age 13). She prepares delicious, nutritious dinners each night that are served on a beautifully set table and right on time. To top it all off, she has enough energy left at the end of the day to be frisky with her husband, who is tremendously content and always feels blessed to be married to her.


Well, I am not this woman.

And this may come as a newsflash to some of you, but I have never met this woman and I do not believe that she exists! There are times that I desperately cling to this ideal, and there are parts of this woman that I relate to, but the truth of the matter is that no-one has it all together as we like to think they do. No-one.


Here are some of my realities, shared in the sincere hope that it makes some of you feel better! :-)


1. I do not rise early. By early I mean seldom before 7:00 and often not until 8:00. Some days I only get up then because it's time to wake the kids, and sometimes they wake me up first!


2. My exercise is sporadic. I know I should work out regularly, but I don't.


3. Despite my best laid plans, sometimes dinner is frozen waffles. Served on paper plates.


4. I do bake our bread, except during times when our life is very busy or there's too much stuff on the counter to use my mixer, or I have a splint on my finger. We've been in a spell like that for the last 3 months.


5. I am not always a motivated homeschool mom and therefore need outside accountability. This year I am teaching science at co-op so that I will have to do it!


6. Sometimes we don't finish schoolwork until dinnertime. Or after.


7. Sometimes we finish schoolwork by early afternoon but the character issues take all day and wear. me. out.


8. My husband rarely gets home before 7:30 p.m. and we have precious little family time other than weekends.


9. There are many nights when my husband and I both fall into bed exhausted and are asleep almost as soon as our heads hit our pillows. Forget frisky. We're talking catatonic.

10. Some days my personal devotions consist of popcorn prayers and a 2 minute devotional read while in the bathroom.

11. I haven't dusted our living room since Easter.

12. I love our homeschool lifestyle, but there are days when I get very discouraged and feel like a failure as a teacher and a mom.


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The reality of our chosen lifestyle and the day to day of our family dynamic is sometimes hard. But consider this encouragement from God's Word:

"In this world you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)


"I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances...... I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation........ I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." (Philippians 4:11-13)

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness (Jesus said). Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.....for when I am weak, then I am strong." (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

How I thank God for His daily strength and grace! Despite the reality of having no shower some days, and my 3 year old potty training Little Man peeing through three outfits before lunch, these days are among the sweetest of my life, and I wouldn't trade them for the world!

7 comments:

Lona said...

Preach it, sistah. I was just sharing the "in this world you will have trouble" verse with a friend the other day. I think it was really for ME.

If we had it all "together", we wouldn't need Jesus, would we?

From another non-organized, sometimes exhausted homeschool mommy...

BlessingintheBattle said...

Great post, Pam. I love your honesty.

Teacher/Mom said...

I think I wrote this, it sounds like me. Oh - no it has your name on it. Actually, I'm up before 7am but I have a 10 month old. And DH goes to bed earlier than I do anyway. And dusting only happens when my mom comes to town with her white glove! Blessings.

5littlewomen said...

So true! I haven't met this woman either nor do I think, on this side of heaven, I could ever be her. Thanks for the encouragement and reminder!

lahbluebonnet said...

This is a good post. However, my husband wants me to be the perfect Proverbs 31 woman. sigh I try so hard to please him. I know I'll never be perfect, much less the Proverbs 31 woman, although he thinks it's obtainable. Pray for me!
Blessings,
Laurie

Beth in Texas said...

Some of these have certainly changed since a year ago. Maybe you should be careful what you write. ;-)

tburchell97 said...

I just want to say AMEN!! I want to actually scream a AMEN Sister!! :) I love your blog because it is REAL- and I don't feel like such a horrible failure after reading it! I have cardiac issues and while I should be pleased I am here to homeschool the best I can- I feel worse on those days when my mind is SUPER active and ready but my body doesn't want to cooperate because my heart is acting up or my beta blockers have literally stolen every ounce of energy I have. You, dear sister in Christ, have just lifted my spirits on one of those such days. God bless you for your wisdom and pure TRUTH- I'm not certain if you know how much you minister to others with your posts but you do! Much love and blessings! btw- I'm not stalking your blog with all of the comments today- but I am stuck on the couch and I think God pointed me to your blog- I'm TRULY enjoying it!!! Lots of love!